adjusting blunder

loner. silent type. as in dead quiet. boring. no personality. with low self-esteem.

diyan iikot ang mga adjectives sa akin marahil kapag napasabak ako sa new environment. at narealize ko baka may adjustment disorder ako.

a person with adjustment disorder often experiences feelings of depression or anxiety or combined depression and anxiety. As a result, that person may act out behaviorally against the "rules and regulations" of family, work, or society. In some people, an adjustment disorder may manifest itself in such behaviors as skipping school, unexpected fighting, recklessness, or legal problems. Other people, however, instead of acting out, may tend to withdraw socially and isolate themselves during their adjustment problems. Still others may not experience behavioral disturbances, but will begin to suffer from physical illness. If someone is already suffering from a medical illness, that condition may worsen during the time of the adjustment disorder. People in the midst of adjustment disorders often do poorly in school or at work. Very commonly they begin to have more difficulty in their close, personal relationships. (athealth.com)

naku. noong freshman ako noong college nahirapan akong magadjust. since sa province ako naghighschool at tumuntong sa college, nadama ko ang takot at pangamba. nagkandabagsak bagsak pa kaya ako noon. dalawang subjects din yun ha at naging probation ba ako! tsk. well naging dl naman ako noong patapos na ang college years eh. haha yabang.

anyway everytime na napapasabak ako sa bagong environment like after grad sa work sobrang hirap na hirap akong magmove on. kay hirap magadjust. sobra. sabi sa internet, minsan nauuwi sa suicide ang may ganitong disorder. well hindi pa naman ako lumevel sa puntong iyon no. pero nagdadaan na naman ako sa phase na iyan. shet buti na lang andiyan mga friends ko para maovercome ko siya. ang gusto ko lang sa adjustment moments ko, umiiyak ako ulit.